John Travolta is 60 today

John Travolta turns 60 today. He has been entertaining cinema goers for decades portraying such iconic  characters like Tony Manero in Saturday Night Fever, Vincent Vega in Pulp Fiction and Terl in Battlefield Earth. He has also been the subject of some controversy regarding his alleged behaviour at certain L.A massage parlours. But hey, if you don't ask you don't get, and surely a polite request for a reach around is not worth one million dollars in emotional damages. Anyway, I digress. Here is a quick look at some of Travolta's finest moments on screen. 

We start at the top in 1977 with Saturday Night Fever.  It's all about the tight silk shirts and the flares that ride up to your nipples. It also includes this exchange. 

Connie: So, are you as good in bed as you are on that dance floor?

Tony Manero: You know, Connie, if you're as good in bed as you are on the dance floor, then you're one lousy f**k.

A year later Travolta appears in probably one of his most famous roles as greaser Danny Zuko. Grease was a wonderful advert for smoking, leather jackets and brill cream. It featured a whole list of wonderful hits like 'Sandy' whose lyrics included 'Why, you left me oh Sandy'. You really don't know John? You tried to rape her at the drive-in! The poor girl ran screaming for her life. Oh Sandy why? Cry me a river John.

Look Who's Talking (1989). Remember this classic where the main gag of the film is the audience gets to hear what a child is thinking. It's a hilarious concept right? And would you believe that at some point during this movie, Travolta drinks breast milk by mistake. Oh the humanity! The Eighties really was a mixed bag for movies.

But all is forgiven as Tarantino salvages Travolta's career, dragging it up from its shoe laces in the 1994 classic, Pulp Fiction. This film catapulted Travolta into the limelight once more. It also did wonders for Samuel L Jackson who has appeared in every other movie since its release.

YEH Broken Arrow. 'I said Goddam what a Rush'. I actually really like this film. Travolta plays a maniac called Deak who harbors dreams for nuclear fallout whilst rocking a roll neck sweater. Travolta smokes cigars in real life and you can tell by watching him smoke cigarettes in films. He holds the cig wedged way up between his fingers, with super-straight, exaggerated, angular release and recapture as he takes a drag. Its a cigarette John not a freakin tiperrilo.

What kind of Pat Butcher lover are you? (viz pending)

With the news this week that the BBC bosses are to relocate the square from Hertfordshire to Salford, we ask, what Pat Butcher lover personality type are you?

TYPE: Dirty Den

Although never portrayed on screen, it was often referred to as part of Pat's back story that she had brief affairs with Den Watts aka 'Dirty Den'. If your a typical Type Den then you more than likely use and abuse women like Pat. When you're not banging girls half your age, or knocking your 3rd wife down the stairs, then you're probably spending most of your time deleting your incriminating sexual history on wikipedia. Eventually you may either end up buried in the cellar of your own drinking establishment, or stranded in a fort talking to dwarves whilst beating off to Melinda Messenger running around in a low cut top and lycra.





TYPE: Patrick Trueman



Chances are you're quite charismatic. Like Dirty Den you're also partial to a bit of domestic violence, but then it is the trend. A typical Type Patrick will have a checkered past and likes to have his affairs in the work place. Your life will be pretty much revolve around other, more interesting people and whether they want to include you in their criminal proclivities, such as storing stolen alcohol and fireworks in your basement. You will possibly have to perform several DNA tests during your time as a result of your previous promiscuous endeavors, but ultimately, you couldn't give a toss about the results because you'll inevitably be off your face on Caribbean Rum.  




TYPE: Pete Beale

Again never actually happened on screen but Pete Beale slipped Pat one when she was a 16 year old prostitute. If you're Type Pete Beale, you will refer to everything female as 'treacle' and you probably enjoy a simple life. The only time you'll find yourself pre-occupied by things other than fruit and veg, is when you suspect that your children aren't from your seed and every woman in your life may in fact, be a manipulative bitch. When your love for fruit and veg narrative runs its natural course, you can look forward to a life spent in the dole queue whilst your character is killed off screen in a needless car accident.






TYPE: Frank Butcher

Frank and Pat had a sexual history as long as the Walford Canal. Unfortunately like the canal, it was filled with murky secrets and used condoms. If you are a typical Type Frank, you will consider yourself very big in the business world, when in reality, you have a dodgy car dealership and/or a lap dancing club. You're a regular heart breaker and like to come out of the woodwork every now and again just to generally do a bit of good old fashioned shit stirring.

   

TYPE: Roy Evans

If you're a Type Roy you really are amongst life's bottom feeders. You will be taking orders from a woman like Pat all day, but unlike Type Frank and Type Den, you will have a good moral core and suffer erectile dysfunction leaving you unable to play the field. Your offspring spawned from your more virile days, will be a manic depressant and will be locked into a loveless marriage before being pushed off a cliff by said wife.

Nautical Numbers (Clothes make the man)

In a bid to try and impress a cute girl in my local news-agent, I once bought an edition of 'Yachting'. An editorial dedicated to the latest ground breaking news in the Yachting universe. Of course it didn't work, and what was I expecting? For her to assume I have a yacht and become over whelmed in a fit of capricious passion that would result in her ripping off my clothes and ravaging me on the counter? So these days instead of buying a syndicated Yachting magazine, I simply kit myself in the kind of clobber that makes me look that I might actually know the difference between starboard and port. (Ps - Port is left. If you need help remembering that imagine the expression 'there is no port left in the bottle', especially after I've had an hour in its company). 

 

There are two numbers you can chance to pull off this look. If you're feeling flush then this sweet little number from Folk is in the sale right now for 250 nicker. This is so up market you get a free yacht with it. I am of course joking. But if you want to stand at the helm and look like a pro, then this is my choice. However if your budget won't allow for the pricey high echelons of nautical attire, then UCLA provide a more than adequate substitute. This UCLA Spears Puffa Jacket comes with a button fasten hood and zip fastening to the front as well as the two front pockets. The waist has a toggle drawstring fastening and tonal seam stitching. The Puffa forges close links with the equestrian and nautical sports. Clearly an item best seen worn when guzzling on the finest wines available to humanity, debating the beauties of an in-out driveway with your rich father-in-law on the quarterdeck aboard his brand new yacht. 

Best dressed boxers

Here is a list of the top 5 best dressed boxers. It's based on scientific research so please don't write in to dispute it. 

5#
FRANK BRUNO

Ahh the beloved Frank. Now Frank has had quite the career. He has been accused of molesting and assaulting his wife along with having a sustained addiction to cocaine. But it's not all been good times for our Frank. He also suffered a crushing first round defeat in the 1989 Christmas special of Family Fortunes. He seems pretty chipper these days however and now dons the kind of suits you might see on Jim Carrey or Jeff Daniels in Dumb and Dumber.

4#
CHRIS EUBANK

I can forgive the lisp, the business suits, the cane, the pocket watch, the narcissism of walking into fights to Tina Turner's 'Simply the Best' before leap frogging the ring ropes, but when you start wearing a flipping monocle. You have to have some sympathy with Bruno really. When the police came to section him he must have been thinking, 'Why are you coming for me? Eubank minces around dressed like Patrick Moore and I'm getting put in a padded cell?'

3# 
GEORGE FOREMAN

I quite like the 70's Foreman wardrobe. He rocked up to fight Ali in Zaire dressed like he should have been playing bass in The James Brown band. Unfortunately he lost his title to Ali, citing lack of concentration during the fight. 'I suddenly had this great idea for a fat reducing grilling appliance between the 3rd and 4th rounds,' George said in the post match press conference. 'it was unfortunate that I had such an entrepreneurial vision during the biggest fight of my career, but that's the curse of being a genius.'  



2#
TOMMY MORRISSON 

Yes other wise known as 'The Duke'. Which is a coincidence because that's the exact name I give to my junk. Now just looking at this picture you wouldn't be able to tell me if this was taken in 1987 or 1988. He was also coined the Shephard of shell suits leading the scouse sheep through the 80's. 

1# BERNARD HOPKINS

Easily one of the most stylish boxers on the circuit right now. And at the age of 48 he is one of the oldest boxers to win an IBF belt when he flopped contender Tavoris Cloud in 2013. He shrouded himself in controversy with his comments in his pre-match press conference with Joe Calzaghe "You're not even in my league! I would never let a white boy beat me." Barked Hopkins. "I would never lose to a white boy. I couldn't go back to the projects if I let a white boy beat me." He lost and was ex-communicated from the projects as a result. 

Dress like David Grohl (only taken)

When I worked on a willow farm I knew a guy that used to do tattoos on the side. He used to power through an 8 pack every saturday night and desecrate a part of his body with a new tiger tattoo. Even his drunk tiger tattoos look better than Dave Grohl's. Honestly have you seen them? Anyway I won't tear in to the guy too much, and luckily his songs are far better than his 90's tribal back alley tramp stamps. Here is a quick look at some of his outfits over the years. 



He often goes for the Lumber Jack two-toned check twill look. The long sleeves, curled to the elbow are conveniently hiding his terrible ink as described earlier. Shades are a must and a handlebar muey complete the rockabilly look.
"I have never done cocaine, ever in my life. I have never done heroin, I have never done speed," he said in a 2008 interview. Congratulations David, if you didn't smash through 40 fags a day and a swimming pool of gin every night I'd have you do a talk at my school. 

Or you good simply slum it in a casual denim over shirt with button down breast pockets. A typical rich man/poor man piece. Would look good either on a front man for one of the biggest band in the world, or if you're heading for an interview down a breakers yard, wear this number, roll up the sleeves, have an allen wrench poking out one of the breast pockets and you'll look incredibly employable. 

Lastly this ensemble which proves David can scrub up with the best of them. A roll neck top with RAW denim, very debonair David. The unpolished texture clearly complimenting David's rugged roughewn streak. Dave is a massive advocate for gay rights "You know what that's about? I believe in love and I believe in equality and I believe in marriage equality." However still yet to play Madame Jo Jo's down in Soho hey David? Come on, put your balls where your mouth is as they say in the trade. 

Nicolas Cage turns 50

Nicolas Cage is 50 today. So in honour of one of the most mercurial actors of our generation I have compiled a list of best Nicolas Cage outfits in movies. I have also inserted some clips of his eccentric mostly over the top acting moments.

BAD LIEUTENANT 

Terence McDonagh

My favourite Nicolas Cage performance. He plays a plays a corrupt lieutenant that sees iguanas when he hallucinates. His outfit is just a schlubby ill fitting grey suit that compounds the misery and nihilism of the character he portrays. Here is one of my favourite scenes where he is waiting for his prescription.

CON AIR

Cameron Poe

'Now why couldn't you put the bunny back in the box.' This film really does kick ass and Cage with his guns soaked in arm butter, rocks a white vest and some stone wash denim to match his hair plugs and dodgy southern accent. Here is one of my favourite clips from the movie, it's not the bunny scene but a mexican stand off with Cusack.

FACE OFF 

Castor Troy

It's the film where John Travolta does the annoying face stroke. I mean really, it's just more creepy than the scene where Castor Troy impersonates a priest and grabs the ass of a young choir girl whilst singing Handel's Messiah. Before he transforms into Travolta and vica versa, Castor Troy dons a classy velveteen silk shirt with a long black overcoat with a tail made to look like a super villains cape. I have included the choir scene for your viewing pleasure.

GONE IN 60 SECONDS

Memphis Raines

'It never Raines is pours'. Yes possibly one of the worst movie lines in history. The rest of the film is pretty hacky as well but there is something rather watchable in this film. It might be the fact that Vinnie Jones turns up half way through and squashes someone's nuts like he did Gascoignes back in the day. However Cage is seen sporting a smooth black leather jacket for most of this flick. The jacket and the original 73 Mustang (Eleanor) are probably the best things in the movie. 

SUPERMAN

Clark Kent

Ok so he never actually played Superman, but he was in the running for the role. Here are some casting shots of what Superman could have looked like if Tim Burton's 'Superman Lives' would have gone ahead if it didn't fall apart in pre-production in the mid 90's. Happy Birthday Nicolas Cage. 

How was your Christmas? PANTS

Bjorn Borg pants

When I was in my early teens my neighbour, who was advanced in her years, bought me some silk boxers with love hearts on them. They were incredibly uncomfortable and due to the nature of the material they were constantly sliding up my back. I didn't need the playground bully to wedgie me, I was doing it myself every time I got off my chair. But at no point did I think the gift to be an inappropriate gesture. However I have noticed a severe sea-change in the politics of buying people pants over this festive period. Mother-in-laws are constantly debating the inner conflict and morality of buying pants as gifts. I say, bring it on. Live a little, and spruce up the christmas stocking. You'll feel liberated and born again. Or should I say Bjorn again! 

Take a look at the Bjorn Borg boxers we have on our site.

It's not too late to get some delivered to your door, for free before Christmas.

These Bjorn Borg Sketchbook Boxers are 95% cotton 5% elastane. Say JA! to Bjorn Borg boxers. Pointless Bjorn Borg fact: Bjorn Borg once auditioned for the part of James Bond shortly before the role was finally given to Timothy Dalton. Rumour has it he only missed out because he couldn't pronounce the name Bond. "Ya my audition was perfect!" Borg told Time magazine. "Look I do it for you now, My name is Bjond Ya. James Bjond."