The best dressed Piano player ever

People stop me on the street all the time and ask Pete, who do you think is the best dressed piano player past or present? Without a moment spent in deliberation, I whip out a list of names that I carry around with me on a laminated card, and recite to them in reverse order, the following;

Elton, disappoints mourners.

5# Elton John. Elton is renowned for his flamboyant wardrobe. The world waited with baited breathe to see what costume he'd sport when it was announced that he'd play Princess Diana's funeral. It was something of an anti-climax when he rolled up in a bog standard black suit with no tassels or sequins on show. It would have been the perfect tonic to the nations misery if he sported the donald duck costume that he wore when he played the New York's Central Park in 1980. For this fashion blogger, his lack of showmanship, really cast a shadow over the whole event. 

Dr John, off his face. 

4# Dr John. The good doctor would often be seen rocking a voodoo head-dress as he growled his way through his psychedelic set. He has spent his entire life battling heroin addiction. However the good times finally came to an end when he teamed up with Ringo Starr and his All-Starr band. After the tour finished he told Rolling Stone magazine, 'I thought Ringo might at least have some stash left over from the White Album, but that tour bus was drier than a popcorn fart.' 

tortures the animals 

3# Jamie Cullum. The pint sized virtuoso is synonymous with jet black slim fit suits. However his reputation was tarnished this week when animal rights activists slammed Cullum for performing at the Krone Circus, known for having an array of exotic animals as entertainment. "These animals go through enough torture in their lives without having to be subjected to Cullum's crooning." Said a spokesman from the Animals Defenders Institute yesterday. 

'F*ck you Virgo' says Jools

2# Jools Holland. This former Squeeze member is infamous for his bespoke waistcoats that he wears on his Later show. The idea was clearly lifted from ex-snooker player John Virgo who used to wow his audience with his pomposity and extravagant waistcoat attire. 'I'm not happy that Jools stole my idea for bespoke waistcoats,' Virgo said. 'I'm not saying thats the reason why Big Break was pulled from the air, but the big wigs at the BBC clearly thought there was only room for one waistcoat fashionista.' 

1# Yuja Wang. Yuja who? Who cares. But check out the pins on this girl. She wore this dress as she performed at the Hollywood Bowl sometime back. Knowing that she wouldn't get any kind of press following that display, Tori Amos announced her retirement the day after.

Genuine Talent.